Pregnant after 8 Years of Infertility
“Is there really a baby in there?”
I lay on the couch, rubbing my belly with a slight smile on my face. “Is there really a baby in there?” I think. Of course. I have the morning sickness, the pregnancy test, and the ultrasound to prove it. Yes, there’s a baby in there.
I wasn’t sure I’d ever get pregnant. A part of me had given up. After eight years of infertility, I was sure a baby would come a different way — through adoption, maybe. That was our plan. We even started the process once, only to pause because of unforeseen life circumstances.
Our Infertility Story
My mother had no known issues with infertility. She quickly conceived and bore five children. Wouldn’t I be the same?
In the beginning, when we first started trying to conceive, I thought it would be so easy. My mother had no known issues with infertility. She quickly conceived and bore five children. Wouldn’t I be the same?
After a year of trying, we went to a fertility specialist. We did all the tests — the blood work and the seamen count. In the end, a laparoscopy discovered my endometriosis — a disorder in which the uterine tissue grows outside the uterus. It can be painful, and I was no exception, experiencing stabbing pains in my pelvic region at certain times during my menstrual cycle.
The doctor suggested doing IUI (intrauterine insemination) right away since I was 30, and it would be better for me to get pregnant now, after he had cleaned out the endometriosis he could see.
And we did. Three times. Each time with failure.
Our next option: IVF (in vitro).
I was unsure about IVF. My biggest worry was: If I couldn’t get the egg to stick to the wall of my uterus and implant now, how would IVF be different? Maybe it would be. But I didn’t trust it.
My husband, Scott, and I decided to work toward adoption.
Our Un-Adoption Story
We weren’t as ready as we thought we were. Not on the inside.
After a couple years, we felt ready to adopt. We were making good money, we had a nice home, and we were ready to start the process.
We found an adoption agency and started the seemingly endless paperwork, training, and home study. Hopefully, we would have a baby by the end of the year.
And then life hit. We weren’t as ready as we thought we were. Not on the inside. I quit my job because of high stress and anxiety, and Scott closed his business. To top it off, Scott was getting ready to be deployed with the military, and we decided to sell our house and move me in with my parents while he was away.
We put adoption on hold.
Two Years Passed
He took a job in Afghanistan that would keep him away for another year.
Scott was away longer than we anticipated. After being deployed with the military for over six months, he took a job in Afghanistan that would keep him away for another year, which turned into longer because of the pandemic.
Scott came home in November 2020, and we started planning our life together again, including a big move halfway across the country.
A New Hope to Get Pregnant
We tried for four months, tracking my cycle, basal body temperature, and most fertile days. And every month, my period came, and I was devastated.
At the time I thought my hope was silly. I had been working to change some lifestyle habits over the two years that Scott was away in hopes that my endometriosis would clear up. The pains had lessened. Maybe I could get pregnant.
We tried for four months, tracking my cycle, basal body temperature, and most fertile days. And every month, my period came, and I was devastated.
I didn’t want to feel that way anymore, so I suggested we quit trying. “Let’s focus on adoption, like we had planned,” I suggested. Scott agreed. We gave up.
The Test Result
We cried. Words escaped us. We were pregnant. Our hopes and prayers had been answered.
I didn’t know it when we gave up, but I was already pregnant.
The time for my period was approaching and I started experiencing pregnancy symptoms. And the period never came.
We bought a pregnancy test. I was excited, nervous, and scared. What if my symptoms were fake, all in my head? What if I was about to be disappointed again?
I took the test anyway.
I’ll never forget that morning, waiting not-so-patiently for the test result to appear on the screen. Scott waited in bed. I’m not sure what he was thinking.
When the test result shows up, I couldn’t believe my eyes. Slowly I walked back to the bed.
“Did you get the result?” he asked.
“We’re pregnant,” I whispered.
“No,” he shook his head, “No.” Tears streamed down his face. “Really?”
I showed him the test. The screen was clear: Pregnant.
We cried. Words escaped us. We were pregnant. Our hopes and prayers had been answered.
Our Miracle
We’re pregnant. After eight years of disappointment and heartache, we are pregnant.
Everyday I experience morning sickness, I feel so grateful. Every time I feel my new baby bump, I am filled with so much love.
After eight years of infertility, of being unsure when and how we would have children, our miracle showed up.
We’re pregnant. After eight years of disappointment and heartache, we are pregnant.
